Flight,
Some pretty good thoughts here, to bad its not true. We have been kicked around alot over the years and maybe its time for pay backs.
Tom Gator 851
PRESIDENTIAL ADDRESS FOR JULY 4, 2003
What follows is the text of a presidential address given by President
Bush on July 4, 2003.
My fellow Americans:
As you all know, the defeat of Iraq's regime has been completed. The
discovery and destruction of all weapons of mass destruction have been
covered thoroughly in the press. A new Iraqi government has been
established and appears to be stable.
Our mission in Iraq is complete.
This morning I gave the order for a complete removal of all American
forces from Iraq. This action will be complete within 30 days.
It is now time to begin the reckoning.
Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the names of countries
which have stood by our side during the Iraq conflict. This list is short.
The United Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, and Poland are some of the
countries listed there.
The other list contains everyone not on the first list. Most of the
world's nations are on that list.
My press secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later this
evening.
Let me start by saying that effective immediately, foreign aid to those
nations on List 2 ceases immediately and indefinitely. The money saved
during the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs of the
Iraqi war.
The American people are no longer going to pour money into third world
hell-holes and watch those government leaders grow fat on corruption.
Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic? Call France.
In the out years, together with Congress, I will work to re-direct this
money toward solving the vexing social problems we still have at home.
I am ordering the immediate withdrawal of all US forces from Kuwait,
Saudi Arabia, and all other Middle Eastern nations. Leave us alone.
Solve your own damn problems. Need help? Call Germany.
On that note, a word to terrorist organizations.
Screw with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all your
relatives from the face of the earth.
Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe China.
Regarding the nation of Israel, I have this to say. It seems like
everybody has forgotten what happened to European Jewry during the 1930s
and World War II. Our nation will never permit the destruction of
Israel. No way, Jose.
Nevertheless, to Israel and the Palestinian Authority. Yo, boys. Yank
yer heads outta rectal defilade and work out a peace deal. Just note
that Camp David is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for
negotiations. They have some great palaces there. Big tables, too.
I'm ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic relations with France,
Germany, and Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are
retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis.
I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin towing the many UN
diplomatic vehicles located in Manhattan with more than two unpaid
tickets to sites where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and
crushed. I don't give a damn about whatever treaty pertains to this.
Pay your tickets or tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers, and
limos be turned over to some of the finest chop shops in the world. I
love New York.
A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2. Since we are
going to be seeing a lot more of each other, you folks might want to try
not pissing us off for a change. Mexico is also on List 2.
President Fox and his entire corrupt government really need an attitude
adjustment. I have a couple extra tank and infantry divisions sitting
around. Guess where I'm gonna put 'em? Yep, border security. So start
doing something with your oil. Oh, the United States is abrogating the
NAFTA treaty---starting now.
It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and its own citizens.
Some will accuse us of xenophobia. My response is simple and direct:
if you can play that word in Scrabble, do it as soon as your turn comes
round.
Some will accuse us of isolationism.
I answer them be saying darn tootin'. Nearly a century of trying to
help folks live a decent life around the world has only earned us the
undying enmity of just about everyone on the planet.
It is time to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate
homelessness in America. It is time to eliminate World Cup soccer from
America.
We will develop energy independence. We will restructure our nation for
its isolationist destiny.
I will be sending legislation to Congress tomorrow proposing the first
actions that that august body should take as we move in a new direction.
Finally, I have decided not to run for a second term of office. The
First Lady and I will retire to our Texas ranch and have some fun.
Laura and I have been talking about takin' one of those cruises up to
Alaska.
Personally, I could care less who gets elected in
2004. Throw a little fascism into the mix and elect Senator Clinton.
She can appoint the editorial board of the New York Times to her Cabinet.
To the nations on List 2, a final thought. Drop dead.
To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys. We owe you.
God bless America. Thank you and good night.