The British are feeling the
pinch in relation to recent bombings and have raised their security
level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon though, security levels may be
raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross." Londoners have
not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all
but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorised from "Tiresome" to a
"Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody
Nuisance" warning level was during the great fire of 1666.

Also, the French government
announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from
"Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Surrender"
and "Collaborate." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that
destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralysing the
country's military capability.

It's not only the English
and French that are on a heightened level of alert. Italy has
increased the alert level from "shout loudly and excitedly" to
"elaborate military posturing". Two more levels remain, "ineffective
combat operations" and "change sides".

The Germans also increased
their alert state from "disdainful arrogance" to "dress in uniform and
sing marching songs". They also have two higher levels: "invade a
neighbour" and "lose".

Belgians, on the other hand,
are all on holiday as usual and the only threat they worry about is
NATO pulling out of Brussels.

Cheers,,,,,,,,, Lynn