Camp Holloway Discussion Forum Archive 05 - 02/12/06 to 01/21/10

Wall-Mart To do list.

Some fun things to do while your spouse shops. Works best if you're over 60 and can convince Security that you're just a harmless eccentric so you don't get arrested, and/or just don't give a rat's ass as long as the wife will never, ever ask you to go with her again. It's a guy thing, we should help each other out on this one.

1. Take boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms. Buy the juice first & keep the receipt. Duh.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell her in an official tone, "Code 3" in Housewares!", and watch what happens.

5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&Ms on layaway.

6. Move a "Caution -- Wet Floor" sign to a carpeted area.

7. Set in a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, cry and ask "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. Looked right into the security camera, using if for a mirror, and pick your nose.

10. While handling guns in the Hunting Department, ask the clerk if he knows where to find the antidepressants.

11. Dart around the store acting suspiciously while humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. Auto Department- practice your "Madonna look" using different sized funnels.

13. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through, yell, "Pick Me! Pick Me!"

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream "No! No! It's those voices again!"

15. Go into a fitting room, shut the door, wait awhile and then yelled very loudly "There's no toilet paper in here!"

16. ....?

Cheers,,,,,,,,,, Lynn

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